Your Doula Training: The Cast of Characters

Note: The following blog entry is an intentionally irreverent parody of doula stereotypes.  While it is true that several characters depicted below were inspired directly by women in my doula trainings, any likeness to anyone in particular is purely coincidental.  

That being said, let's reinforce some stereotypes!!
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So you're becoming a doula! 

You've probably already decided that your personae fits within your understanding of what a doula is.  Understandable, that's what I thought as well.  Until I attended my first training.  It was then I realized that "the doula personae" is not always what you think.  In fact, there are many kinds of people (highly different from one another, as you'll find) who believe they also embody these qualities.  You might experience some serious cognitive dissonance when you meet them.  How could you be the same kind of person as her?!  Are you really that crunchy/grandmotherly/opinionated/touchy-feely? 

Don't panic.  You're probably not very much like most of them.  There are maybe hundreds of pregnant folks in your area, and they probably each have a very unique perspective on what a doula is.  That's why families interview more than one of us... heaven forbid a conservative religious woman ends up with a transgendered anarcho-feminist, or vice-versa. 

You will notice, however, that there are definite patterns in the personae of aspiring doulas, each with their own unique perspective on birth, women, and life in general.  Let's take a quick tour of the major ones, shall we?


The Experienced Mama

If her mismatched, spit-up-stained attire didn't give her away, her advanced insight into the birth process most definitely did.  The Experienced Mama is the one who has had a number of varying birth experiences.  She can speak from experience on induction, c-section, VBAC, and natural birth.  She has probably taken a variety of childbirth classes, and who knows, may be on track to becoming a childbirth educator herself.  When it comes to breastfeeding, she's experienced it all, and probably is still nursing her youngest child.  A kind, sisterly woman in her 30s, The Experienced Mama will score big on the relatability factor when she starts going to interviews.


The Religious One

You picked her out the moment she drove up in her full-sized van covered in pro-life bumper stickers.  She's not just religious; she's an unapologetic fundamentalist.  Like The Experienced Mama, The Religious One has had a variety of birth experiences... how could she not, she has 10 kids!  Of course, unlike The Experienced Mama, her birth experiences are likely to be recounted with vaguely-relative Bible passages.

Here's a woman who believes in "keeping her womb open to the will of God."  Meaning, she does not use any form of birth control (including FAM), believing that God will decide how many children she will have.  She pipes in rather often, decrying the modern age as a force that has made women forget "what their bodies were made for."  Her clinging to "the way God intended it to be" rubs the majority of the room the wrong way regardless of religious affiliation.  Look for an entertaining spat between The Religious One and The Rabid Feminist during lunch.

The Rabid Feminist

She made her entrance donning a tank top that read "FUCK PATRIARCHY." Between that and the vulva pendant hanging around her neck, The Rabid Feminist doesn't hide why she's interested in becoming a doula.

She probably has a history as a pro-choice activist or a clinic escort.  She is fascinated by the process of childbirth, the strength of laboring women, and finds it all to be political in nature.  She drives the group slightly bonkers with her constant correction of "the generic he" and her many off-kilter remarks about how not all pregnant folks identify as women.  Despite her fierce attitude, she seems rather taken with The Natural.

The Natural

Here's a woman who, before the training even begins, seems to radiate doula.  We're always told that being a doula is more about presence than experience, and in this person's case we believe it.  She has probably never attended a birth before, and while she knows childbirth basics, she in no way possesses any more trainable doula skills than any other person in the room.

The Natural has a voice that immediately calms.  It's quiet while being firm, reassuring and instantly relaxing.  When she speaks, shoulders around the room drop an inch.  Her face naturally rests in a pleasant expression, even if she is not physically smiling.  In her other life, she is probably a Reiki practitioner or a clinical herbalist.  She's adorned in loose-fitting, neutral toned garments and several pieces of under-stated turquoise jewelry.  Look for The Natural purchasing bulk herbs in your local organic co-op.

The "At My Birth, We..."

The one thing that brings the whole group together, aside from the desire to be doulas, is the growing disdain for The "At My Birth, We..."

While she means well, this is a person who can't seem to stop relating every single topic back to her own experience.  It seems literally anything said by the trainer or fellow participants can be related back to The "At My Birth, We..."  Discussing epidurals?  She thought about having one of those, but by the time the anesthesiologist got there the baby was already born.  The double-hip squeeze?  Her husband did that, and it helped for a little while but not during transition.  Turkey sandwiches for lunch?  She had one of those after the birth of her 1st child, but after the 2nd she'd had roast beef. By the end of the training, the entire group could write whole volumes on this woman's birthing experiences.

She might be the same person as The Experienced Mama.


The Conspiracy Theorist

The entire medical establishment is out to get you.  At least, that's the case if you believe The Conspiracy Theorist.

Having no medical experience herself, The Conspiracy Theorist "knows in her heart" (or possibly read somewhere on the internet) that inductions and c-sections are never actually necessary.  She pipes into the discussion rather infrequently, but every time she does, her remarks raise eyebrows around the room.  "Did you know that the postpartum eye goop has been shown to cause blindness in rats?"  "Did you know vaccines contain a chemical that brainwashes children?"  "Did you know that school lunches contain tracking devices so that the government can keep an eye on you at all times?"

The Conspiracy Theorist is the only person in the room who scoffs when the trainer discusses car seat laws and will likely be the same person who gets all doulas banned from the area hospital. 

The Traumatized

The uncontested heartbreaker of the group, The Traumatized has experienced the worst that the field of obstetrics has to offer.  Maybe she was uneducated and timidly agreed to an unnecessary induction.  Maybe she had care providers who wouldn't inform her about what was going on.  Maybe she had her first baby young, or maybe she had endured a c-section after the epidural had worn off.

Whatever it was, The Traumatized brings tears to everyone's eyes when she gently recounts her birth experience.  Her impetus for becoming a doula rests primarily in her mission to ensure no woman ever has to endure what she endured.  Or maybe she later had a beautiful birth experience with a doula and wants to share that with the world.  The Traumatized can speak to the cascade of interventions with tears in her eyes, though as a survivor she in and of herself is a healer.  She may inadvertently add fuel to the flames burning within both The Rabid Feminist and The Conspiracy Theorist.  



The Bored Housewife

This week, she wants to be a doula.  Two months from now, she might be enrolling in karate classes. The year prior, she briefly considered selling Mary Kay.

The Bored Housewife probably suffers from "Empty Nest Syndrome."  Her entire adult career has centered around being a wife and mother, and now that the kids have left the nest and her wealthy husband spends most of his days on the links, she needs to find a new cause to keep herself active.  She's sincere about her passion, but she lacks the motivation to move forward with it.  Or maybe she does and becomes the best doula ever.  Only time will tell.


The Birth Junkie

Some people jump out of airplanes.  Others shoot up heroin.  This woman gets her fix attending births.

The Birth Junkie is nothing if not passionate.  She will go on to love and connect with every mother she works with, but let's face it... at the end of the day, the reward is in the crowning.  Such an adrenalin rush lasts her several days, at which point she collapses on her bed awaiting her next client's call.  Though she may be older, The Birth Junkie never seems to get tired of the work.  Younger doulas look up to her and regard her energy as nothing short of awesome.  Her only downfall is that she tends to relive her own birth experiences vicariously through her clients.

She may be the same person as The Professional Grandmother.

The Retired Nurse

In her years of working labor and delivery, this woman has seen it all. If the doula trainer cannot answer a question about the physiology of childbirth, bet your bottom The Retired Nurse can.

She worked as a L&D nurse for a while, but the long hours and hospital wear-and-tear finally got to her.  With her nursing career behind her, The Retired Nurse is excited to be responsible for only one laboring family at a time, and better yet, she doesn't have to subject women to vaginal exams ever again!  As an added bonus, she already knows all the area's midwives and obstetricians.  Her pitfall will be her impulse to adjust fetal monitors or do a quick blood pressure check during labor, but overall, you can count on this one to be a champion doula.


The Professional Grandmother
Your first conversation with her ended with you thinking, "Well isn't she nice!"  That's her inner doula already shining through.  The Professional Grandmother is what you'd consider to be a "motherly doula."  Her kids are all grown and maybe have even had the privilege of having her at their own births.  Women will hire The Professional Grandmother first and foremost because she reminds them of their own mother (without all the maternal baggage, of course).

NC General Assembly overrides veto, defunds Planned Parenthood

There are numerous reasons North Carolina residents should be angry this morning.  If you are a teacher, a parent of a child in public school, a college student, a state employee, a woman, uninsured, lower-income, a person with mental illness, an infant, or a health worker, yesterday's late-night veto override of the state budget affects you. 

Five Democrats joined the Republican majority in the override.  I could go on and on about all the ways that this budget is, pardon my language, royally fucked, but I need to focus primarily on the defunding of Planned Parenthood. 

Despite the fact that 57% of NC voters support state funding for Planned Parenthood, the GOP has used its majority, once again, to enact an ideology.  With this budget, the GOP is waging class warfare against the most underserved communities, not just in its defunding of low-cost health clinics, but in its major cuts to education and human services as well.  Don't even get me started on what this means for state employees (predominately lower-income people of color).

But I digress.  This entry is about Planned Parenthood.

Last night's vote basically removes Planned Parenthood's ability to be a Title X provider.  They are now no longer eligible to receive grants from the Women's Health Services Fund or the Teen Pregnancy Prevention Initiatives program.

I have been a regular client of my local Planned Parenthood clinic for four years.  I have received annual pap smears, regular physical exams, low-cost birth control, and a very inexpensive breast exam that one time I found a strange lump.  Not one of these visits ever put me in the poor house even though my health insurance doesn't cover me unless I get hit by a bus.  Hell, they even did a strep throat test for me this one time I was on call for a birth and thought I was getting sick.

I have friends who have received all that and more from Planned Parenthood clinics.  They've gotten STD testing and treatment.  They've had cervical cancer screenings.  They've gotten pregnancy tests and options counseling.  They've had abortions.  They've received referrals for low-cost prenatal care.

If this is what our General Assembly really thinks the state wants, they have another thing coming.  There are too many of us who have received quality health care that they can afford, in part due to the state's funding of Planned Parenthood through the health block grants that they are now ineligible to receive.  We will see the results of this, and fast.  Sweeping cuts to education, massive lay-offs in the government sector, rampant attacks on the environment, cuts to WIC programs, and of course the lack of low-cost health care outside of county-run health departments resinate with far too many NC residents for us to just sit back and take it.

The question now is, what are we going to do about it?

The Follow-Up

Today I received a birth announcement from a mama whose birth I attended last month.  It was such a beautiful card, featuring two pictures of the adorable baby girl that I had been privileged to see enter the world just six weeks earlier.  I am on call for another birth now, and have been for almost two weeks.  I hate being on call.  There is something about my mind that is never quite settled, and every on call session, I start to wonder why on earth I chose this path.

Then, of course, the mama goes into labor and I get to watch it all over again: a woman's inner strength shining through her as she brings into the world a new tiny lifeform.  There's blood.  There's sweat.  There's usually some tears.  It's amazing, and each time I kick myself for questioning my love for this work, no matter how fleeting the thought was. 

My favorite thing, honestly, is running into the family at a later date.  Sometimes they contact you with an accompanying photo, the baby that had been a mere six pounds now pulling up and taking practice steps.  Sometimes you just run into each other in the grocery store or at a yoga class.  It's all wonderful, and such a great feeling to know that they thought of you as an important part of their birth experience.

Last month I also supported a woman through an abortion.  Since we are not yet ok'ed by the clinic, I can't say I was her "doula," but I did my best with what I had: we had several conversations over the phone, I drove her to the clinic, I held her hand as she completed her paperwork, and after it was over, I drove her back home and left her with self-care instructions to go along with the instructions she had received at the clinic. 

This was a very wanted abortion, at least as wanted as it could be considering its need arose from a very unwanted pregnancy.  It was not sought due to financial restrictions, fetal anomoly, or an abusive relationship.  This woman had simply become pregnant accidentally.  She was young and not ready to be a mother.  By the time we left the clinic, all the anxiety I had read in her voice in the days prior were gone.  We barely even talked about the abortion on the half-hour drive back to town, except that she had used the breathing techniques I suggested and they worked really well.  We talked about what she was studying in college, how she was hoping to feel upbeat enough to go to a party that evening, and how she was planning on spending her summer break.  Back at her house, she hugged me and thanked me for being there for her, and I told her to give us a ring if she needed to talk about anything later on.  I haven't heard from her since.

The difference between birth doula'ing and abortion doula'ing may seem immense, but it's really the same kind of work.  You discuss options, make sure the person you're supporting can make informed decisions, support them through whatever decision they make, and are there for them every step of the way (except during the abortion procedure, for security reasons).  The major difference is, obviously, the outcome.  I could sit down and write an email to any one of my birth clients, and I'm sure I would later recieve not only an update, but a link to a Picasa album as well.  When I emailed my abortion patient the next day, just to see how she was feeling, I never heard back.  Which is fine.  And I'm sure if I did run into her at the grocery store, we would chat and things would be cheerful.  But of course, there would be very little ooh-ing and awe-ing over how not pregnant she was the way I would ooh and awe over my birth clients' babies ("Oh, he's gotten so big!"  "Oh wow, you look great!" etc). 

This makes abortion doula work rewarding in a completely different way.  At the end of the day, you don't get announcements in the mail about how not-pregnant your client is.  They don't send you pictures of their flat belly or write you telling you how not being pregnant is going for them.  From what more experienced abortion doulas have told me, you usually don't hear anything from them ever again.  Statistically, you're not even likely to get a request for a post-abortion resource. 

When you're supporting someone through an abortion, the moment that you actually connect is very fleeting.  But that's really the beauty of it.  My abortion patient told me that she was happy I was able to drive her, because her friends would have had expectations of how she should act/feel/react.  I, on the other hand, had no expectations for her: to her, I was a kind stranger with a good ear.  What I was for her was exactly what she needed, and I suppose that in and of itself is plenty for me. 

On Fidelity

This whole Anthony Weiner thing has got me thinking about the parameters of "fidelity" in relationships.  By which I mean, fidelity is (to me) a relative concept, defined by the individuals involved in the relationship.

First I have to say this: I don't know whether or not these internet and phone exchanges were okay with Weiner's wife.  He mentioned that she knew about them before they were married, but we don't know whether or not that means she was cool with it.  If she doesn't consider it cheating, then he wasn't cheating.  Period.

Regardless of the parameters of the congressman's marriage, there are many couples out there who would not consider what he did cheating.  Some couples have open relationships where outside sexual experiences are fine.  For others, the partner has to actually have sexual contact for it to be considered cheating.  On the other side, there are folks who believe that sending suggestive photos over the internet is, in fact, cheating.  There are also those who think that receiving a lapdance is cheating.  Even further down the spectrum, some people consider watching pornography cheating, and others think that even masturbating is cheating.  Some people even believe that looking at another human with a lustful eye is cheating (think Christine O'Donnell here). 

What I'm trying to say is that this concept of "fidelity" is too relative for us to just point blank say that Anthony Weiner was cheating on his wife, especially if we don't know what was and was not okay between both partners.  If his wife was fine with it, then he wasn't cheating, because "cheating" by definition implies that one partner was breaking the rules of the relationship.

Cue the barrage of conservative Bible-thumpers who believe everybody should live by their standards.  Many have probably already spoken out about Weiner's supposed "infidelity," and to be sure many more would if they themselves hadn't already been caught toe-tapping in some airport men's room.  For these folks, even couples who have a polyamorous agreement are "cheating."  While they may be "cheating" on the standards laid out in certain religious beliefs, not everybody conforms to such a rigid set of rules. 

What would be lovely is if we were all comfortable enough with our partners to discuss these parameters, and have them be equally-applicable.  But because we live in a patriarchal society, there will always be a certain shame in discussing just how "faithful" we need to be.  To be sure, if we can't clearly discuss our thoughts on morality, monogamy, lust, attraction, etc, then we're going to continue having a whole lot of "cheaters" in the world.  Some folks who don't believe looking at porn is cheating might be surprised when they're "caught" and their partners accuse them of infidelity.  Others might push the limits further and further until they do cross a boundary that, instead of being discussed thoroughly, was assumed to be cheating by one partner but not the offender.

Me, I have my own definitions of what constitutes cheating, but those aren't really any of your business.  Not being a relationship counselor, I can't say what folks should do when their boundaries don't meet, though it's fair to say that a simple compromise might lead to grudges and back-handed revenge. 

Regardless, I don't know whether or not Weiner cheated on his wife.  I honestly think he apologized to her, first and foremost, for having made the mistake of making his "junk" so public, and for making her the wife of a guy involved in a sex scandal.  Or maybe she wasn't okay with it but pretended to be, or maybe she just decided to turn a blind eye to avoid the matter altogether.  Again, I really don't know, but as much as I'd like to find out, I know that their personal definitions of fidelity are really none of our damn business.

The Importance of Clinic Defense

Note: The following was first published at ChoiceUSA's Choice Words.
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Every Saturday morning, a dedicated group of volunteers arrives outside of the Louisville EMW Surgical Center, Kentucky's only abortion clinic. On the surface, their job is simple: accompany the clinic's patients from their cars to the clinic doors. But considering the crowds of invasive protesters doing everything in their power to block people from entering the clinic, a day in the life of a clinic escort is anything but simple.

After having possibly driven hours the morning of an abortion, this is what Kentucky's abortion patients can expect to encounter upon arrival:


They call themselves "sidewalk counselors," many of which are from the crisis pregnancy center across the street. Some wear orange jackets similar to those worn by the escorts to further confuse and ambush folks trying to enter the clinic. The ACLU has said that the EMW Surgical Center encounters some of the largest, most aggressive anti-abortion protests in the country.

Further south, the NC-based antichoice group Operation Save America regularly targets Family Reproductive Health, a Charlotte clinic known by many to be one of the most caring, compassionate clinics in the state.


The man depicted in the above video, Flip Benham, was found guilty of stalking a doctor last November and given 1 year probation. The ruling hasn't stopped Benham's followers from appearing week after week to shout over the clinic's gate in his place. Clinic defender and activist Scott Trent describes OSA as "one of the most reactionary, bigoted Christian Fascist groups in the country." Despite the very dedicated group of defenders that show up in the wee hours every week, the harassment continues. "They regularly climb the tree on the border of the property to shout at women going into the clinic, block the driveway in flagrant violation of the FACE Act," Trent tells me, adding that local police regularly neglect to enforce the federal law.

During one of the weeks I was able to make the 90-mile trek to Charlotte, a representative from an area mom's group approached me with a contact sheet. "As a group, we're neither pro-choice nor pro-life," she told me, but they oppose Operation Save America because of their tactics. She was referring to the giant posters depicting aborted fetuses and embryonic remains, saying that as moms, they don't want their young children exposed to such gruesome images. Additionally, she continued, "One of our moms has had multiple miscarriages, several have had abortions, and the posters trigger panic attacks." The moms group is working on a project where folks can hold signs warning oncoming traffic that there are graphic images ahead, then point folks in the direction of a detour.

I could go on about the importance of clinic defense, how activists in both small and large numbers sacrifice their time and their safety to uphold the right to choose. It shouldn't have to be this way, but this is the reality we live in. And while the Feds and local law enforcement alike could be doing more to enforce the FACE Act, defenders put themselves on the line to pick up where the police do not (or cannot) step in.

End Note: This summer, Operation Rescue is revitalizing the "Summer of Mercy" event that led to increasingly violent action against the slain Dr. Tiller in Wichita 20 years ago. This time they're targeting Dr. Carhart at his new Germantown, MD location. If you are able, hook in with local organizations, contact folks organizing defense projects to keep this clinic safe and open. The Summer of Mercy event 20 years ago involved human blockages of clinic entrances, massive arrests, violence, and profound harassment of those receiving much-needed needed care.

This Is Why Your Kids Are Sick

Mere hours after running across this fantastic mama blog on all the great reasons to let your kids get dirty, I discovered a brand new product that Lysol thinks we should all be using: disinfectant spray for your fabrics! 

Not to get all "back in my day," because to be sure, "my day" wasn't all that long ago.  And I'm sure the 80s had their share of "Lysol Moms" too.  Fortunately, my mom wasn't one of them, and I have the immune system to thank for it.  This is not to say that all kids who get sick a lot or who have many allergies are victims of over-cleanliness, but if you're questioning why more and more older kids and young adults seem to get knocked on their asses every time a virus goes around, you might not have to look much further than Target's cleaner aisles.  (And a few other choice environmental hazards.)

The "germophobia" thing bugs me for more reasons than the fact that other people's kids are going to be getting sicker (though I do work in health, so it is a concern of mine).  It's bad enough that whole generations of children are being denied the ability to develop their own immune systems, but there are other consequences as well:

• The burden of a sterile environment falls, not surprisingly, on Mom.  Women, especially moms, have long been targeted for their consumer ability and the expectation that they will keep their homes spotless.  The blame for anything less than a 100% sterile environment generally falls right smack on "bad mothering." 
• Creating a sterile environment requires a home keeper to purchase products, and lots of them.  Clorox, Proctor and Gamble, and others are really cashing in on the germophobia that they have surely had a hand in creating.  
• These products are horrible -- let me say that again -- HORRIBLE for the environment.  Whether it's in their manufacturing, transport, or utility, the vast majority of cleaning products are riddled with chemicals that create a toxic (albeit a "sterile" version of toxic) environment. 
• I'm not gonna lie... I believe that germophobia can limit a kid's right to be a kid.  Playing in the dirt, touching stuff that all their friends have touched, sharing an ice cream cone with your dog... it's what I want for my kid(s?), and I know it's what many kids want for themselves.  They don't need to have these awesome activities interrupted every 20 minutes for a "Purell break."
• That a huge body of medical research encourages parents to let their kids be dirty little hooligans proves just how pervasive the sterile impulse is. 

So while I may entitle this collection "This Is Why Your Kid Is Sick All The Time," know that I have more concerns than the strength of a child's immune system.  To be sure, the immunity is a big one, but what goes along with it is an all-encompassing, uber-feminist anti-capitalist vendetta against all things sterile.

The product that started it all.  You know, for all the household items that can't be sprayed down with traditional disinfectant.  I imagine this product is much like Febreze, except it's guaranteed to kill everything in its path... including, most likely, one or two layers of your skin.

 

Proudly wear your Purell Bling!  Hook it everywhere... your pocket book, backpack, diaper bag... oh yes, don't forget to slop the stuff all over your infant (I've seen it done)!

 

Lysol Disinfectant Spray... for the air!  Just spray it everywhere.  For serious, just run around your house letting that aerosol can add some sterility to the very air you breathe.

Germ-X is basically just isopropyl alcohol, so while its over-use will eventually create more alcohol-resistant bacteria (not to mention halt your kids' immune development if it's over-used), it's generally not terrible for the environ... oh, shit.  "Individually Wrapped Wipes?" Crap.

 Meanwhile, in the world of creating a problem so you can sell the solution, Kleenex is trying to convince you that cloth hand towels are germ-ridden plague factories.  According to their website,  "The CDC guidelines for hand washing recommends hand drying with a single-use towel."  (Oh, do they now?)  Of course, for those committed to keeping their home as sterile as the average clinic environment, sure, why not toss out those money- and environment-saving cloth towels for a single-use piece of paper?

Taking a break from cleaning products to point out the single most effective way folks can help their kids develop a strong immune systems: BREASTFEEDING!  Won't go too deeply into this one, since if you're reading my blog you already know it, but breastmilk contains more readily-digestible vitamins, nutrients, and yes, immune-building antibodies than any other infant food.  In fact, new research suggests that the mama's skin cells (ingested by baby when s/he latches) contain antibodies that fight off air-borne infections that might have just entered the environment (can't find the article right now, sorry).  In other words, putting baby to breast is like a more effective (and less stinky) Lysol spray! 

I know, I know... shopping carts are loaded with nasty crap.  But come on.  If it's flu season, by all means, wipe it down with a wet cloth (or just be old-school and wash your hands after you shop), but let's not forget the effects of antibacterial over-use.

I might get shat on for this one.  I admit, shopping carts are incredibly dirty, and the covers are incredibly cute.  It might make us cringe to think about what flavors of nasty lurk upon our carts' handlebars, but I have enough friends with toddlers to know that this is far from the grossest thing your kid will put in her mouth today. Besides, isn't this just one more product that moms are being guilt-tripped into purchasing?  One more thing to carry in the diaper bag?  One more thing to futz with at the grocery store while your other youngsters run off and eat god knows what?

I saw a lil' one the other day at Earth Face, probably around 18 months, vociferously gnawing on the bare handlebars of the shopping cart.  And you know what?  I bet that child is going to be just fine.

 

Do I even need to discuss the over-use of antibiotics?  I didn't think so.  I mean, if we're talking a severe infection with a fever and all that, for the love of all that is holy, get your child some antibiotics!  But a sniffle with nothing more than a low-grade fever?  No diagnosis of infection?  Prescription for Amoxicillin "just in case?"  I wouldn't go there.

Of course, as I've said, the biggest issue I have with the clean craze (aside from the total robbing of one's childhood) is the burden it puts on women, particularly Mom, to keep the kids safe from any and all things germy.  A child that gnaws on a shopping cart handle, eats mud, or decides that the contents of the kitty litter box is candy may very well contract a virus, an infection, a parasite... but that's why we have medicine.  Preemptive treatments -- that is, the treatments that rob us of our natural abilities to fight off the bad stuff -- are well-known to put us at greater risk, and from that no one benefits.  Of course, waiting until an illness pops up doesn't make a lot of money, especially to the P&Gs of the world.  So we create problems, then sell the stuff to fix it.  And when it comes to such pervasive indoctrination of entire generations, we gotta start 'em early:

 

For the rest of you, let your kids' filth flags fly!

Mother's Day 2011

This Mama's Day, Asian Communities for Reproductive Justice's Strong Families Initiative partnered with a number of organizations to host a blog series on motherhood and justice.  This series was intended to give special recognition to the moms who often go unnoticed: young moms, moms of color, queer moms, moms who didn't give birth to their children, immigrant moms and others. 

I was asked, via my blogging gig at ChoiceUSA, to add my perspective as a birth doula who also works in the reproductive justice field.  My piece centered around the many intersections of abortion and motherhood, compounded by other factors such as race, class, documentation status, gender identity, etc.

Read it here:

Supporting Her Journey: A Full-Spectrum Doula’s Look at the Politics of Motherhood