Overheard at Jo-Ann's

I was in line to get some fabric cut today when I overheard a fellow customer ranting about her child's school dress code.  The diatribe went something like this:

"I don't understand the issue.  She's a girl and she has to wear polo shirts?  What are they going to make her into?  [Fabric cutter lady nods uncomfortably.]  I mean, they got this 'standards of dress' thing to cut down on something like peer pressure and 'troublesome behavior.'  I guess that's code for gangs.  But look at my child!  She is not going to join a gang, look at her for crying out loud!  [Fabric cutters and other customers give each other awkward glances.]  If they want to cut down on gangs with dress codes, that's fine, make just the hoodlum kids have a uniform.  That's fine with me.  And there's all this crying about not wanting kids to have clothes that other kids don't have, oh puh-leez!  She's my daughter, I should be able to dress her how ever I want."

So, to recap this lady's position on her daughter's school dress code:

• Forcing girls into polo shirts will turn them into raving lesbians.
• White kids don't get into trouble, especially the girls.
• The school should have a uniform, but only for the black kids.
• School uniforms are one more way the government is turning us into a socialist nation where people aren't allowed to decide what their kids wear to school.  This is bad, but only if you're a white family ("hoodlum kids" still gotta rock the uniform).

Lovely.